Rules:
1. Remember, this is a review site, involving actual opinions and such. We're angry people from Spokane, and as such this review site will conceal none of our ire. If your diary sucks, we will tell you so.
2. No locked diaries. It is so fucking pointless if no one is going to read it anyway. We're big on having that whole life thing. You shall not waste our time.
3. Diaryland only. This is an arbitrary rule. We don't even know why. If you really, really want us to review you even if you're not on Diaryland, we'll talk, and possibly make an exception. What a stupid fucking rule. We'll take anyone.
4. We'll try to be nice. Don't expect too much of us, though.
5. Flames will be ignored. If you persist, or if we think your pain is funny enough, we'll slap you on the Wall of Shame, where you and your bad grammar and punctuation will be subjected to public ridicule of the worst degree. Do not toy with us.
6. Link us. Preferably somewhere, you know, visible. We'll still review you if it's not there, but we might jump into your review with a little more biased attitude, and it won't necessarily be favorable. Because honestly, it's not too hard to put up a fucking link.
7. Depending on your preferences, you may or may not want to request a reviewer. It's not required, though. There used to be more than one person here, but that is no more. For now, it's just me (meredith), so you're stuck. I'm a bit of a control freak, and like for the vitriol I post here to be of a certain quality. If you want to review, I think I'll have to ask for a sample review. Any diary is fine, but you should probably choose a really shitty one, so I can see just how petty and catty vicious you can be.
To conclude: Constructive or no, this is criticism. We may or may not give suggestions on how to help improve your diary, because we don't have to. This is purely for our enjoyment, and unfortunately our fun requires interaction with you. It's not our fault if your diary sucks. If your diary doesn't suck, you need not fear us. If it does suck, well then ... you should find a nicer reviewer.